That’s all for today. Thanks for your company and emails; I’ll leave with Jacob Steinberg’s report from the London Stadium. Ta-ra.
And Tim de Lisle is your man for the Manchester derby. Well, let us not talk about the cricket.
Peep peep! That’s a terrific win for Everton, their third in five league games. Their defense, especially that of James Tarkowski and Jarrad Branthwaite at center back, was excellent, and they controlled the few opportunities they had.
Dominic Calvert-Lewin, whose presence makes such a difference to this team, scored a really good winning goal early in the second half. Whisper it, but Everton are threatening to become a serious football team again. Although Sean Dyche is frequently mocked, he is an extremely skilled football manager.
West Ham were very poor, and there were loud boos at the final whistle. They’ll be fine, though they do need to work out how to pick the lock when teams defend deep.
90+5 min There’s audible dissent from the home crowd when Benrahma is tackled by Harrison. It’s been one of those days for West Ham; they’re a better attacking team than they have shown today, though Everton deserve credit for making them look so bad.
90+4 min McNeil goes down with a head injury, though West Ham are pretty sure he’s trying it on. He’s fine.
90+2 min The excellent Onana fights off Soucek and finds McNeil. Although his shot is blocked, he gets the rebound and beats Coufal for a throw-in.
Ninety minutes: Nice pickford save! Paqueta curls a very deep cross to Benrahma, who hammers a technically superb volley towards the near post. Pickford dives to his right to push it away. It was such a sweet strike from Benrahma.
There will be six added minutes.
89 min: Everton substitution Youssef Chermiti replaces Dominic Calvert-Lewin, whose fine goal separates the teams.
88 min Aguerd tries to place one from 25 yards. Everton breaks as it is kicked away. They have played outstanding defense today. It is easy to see why Jarrad Branthwaite is so well-liked; at just 21 years old, he exudes calmness despite his strength, deceptive quickness, and important stature.
87 min West Ham have had one shot on target, and I can’t even remember it. Pickford, who is backpedalling, tips Aguerd’s mishit cross over the bar, giving them a lucky break. I think that would have gone in.
85 min: West Ham substitution Danny Ings replaces Aaron Cresswell, which means a switch to a back three.
84 min “It started way before the 1990s,” says Richard Hirst of the ABU culture. The 1970s hooliganism of Manchester United’s fans, along with the unlikability of teams led by snarling little players like Mickey Thomas and Arthur Albiston, are two things that come to mind. But other views may be available!”
You’re right – I was referring specifically to the phrase “Anyone But United”, which I think was coined by somebody in Ireland when United had four players sent off in five games in the spring of 1994. The whole thing began when Alan Mullery, who was United’s title rival that season, donned a Blackburn jacket on Sport in Question, I believe.
82 min Alvarez is booked for leaving one on Onana. He’ll miss the Brentford game as well.
81 min If it stays like this Everton will move up to 15th (assuming Nottingham Forest, who are 2-0 down at Anfield, lose by at least two goals). They would be only two points behind Chelsea and, more importantly, five ahead of Luton in 18th.
As Phil Grey said in the 3rd minute, they could well survive even if they are deduced 12 points.
80 min Everton have defended superbly, but it’s hard to fathom how poor West Ham have been going forward. This is the kind of performance that generates hashtags.
78 min Pickford makes a brilliant point-blank save from Kudus, though it wouldn’t have counted as Kudus was offside.
77 min Benrahma is booked for pulling back Garner, another man who has quietly established himself in this Everton team.
76 min “As the ‘inspiration’ I’d happily go with Eric Petersen’s suggestion,” says Richard Hirst. “It would be interesting to see how far Man Utd would be below all other teams, as everybody other than Utd supporters most disliked team. And to think in 1968 I wanted them to win the European Cup: it wouldn’t happen now!”
I was doing something on 1992-93 recently and it’s fascinating, looking through the archives, to see how much goodwill there was towards Man Utd. Within a year they were loathed and the concept of Anyone But United was born.
75 min Calvert-Lewin crashes a shot off the underside of the bar, though he was well offside.
75 min Everton continue to frustrate West Ham’s attack. That centre-back pairing of Tarkowski and Branthwaite looks like a keeper.
74 min “I’m glad Alphonse Areola is getting a run in the team,” writes Kári Tulinius. “Being a goalkeeper is such a weird role, because as Arteta has shown this season, players can’t rotate in and out without sending some fans and commentators into meltdown. He’s much too good to be a benchwarmer.”
He is. I was going to say “so is Fabianski”, then I realised he’s 38 years old. When did that happen?
73 min: West Ham substitution Tomas Soucek replaces James Ward-Prowse. That’s a slight surprise, especially as you’d imagine Soucek has been brought on partly for his threat at set-pieces.
72 min If it stays like this, and that’s a reasonably sized if, Everton will have quietly won four of their last six games in all competitions. They threaten to make it 2-0 when Garner’s low cross towards Harrison is cut out at the near post.
64 min “Richard Hirst (33 min) has prompted me to consider the possibility of documenting a personal Premier League table of support, factoring in not only all these allegiances that we of a certain age have collected but also their rivalries,” writes Eric Peterson.
“For example, I became an Everton supporter specifically because of my enmity toward Liverpool, which arose from a part of my youth spent in Italy and seeing them beat my hometown Roma in the 1984 European Cup.
I’m fond of Fulham because my sister’s family visited Craven Cottage during a London holiday and were besotted by the experience. Consequently, that makes it more fun to make fun of Chelsea’s recent woes.
“I’m fond of West Ham because Everton legend David Moyes has found a happy home there. That means I’ll be hostile toward Millwall if they ever bounce up into the Premier League.
And I’d welcome Leicester back into the top tier with open arms, from the joy I felt from their title run under former Roma defender Claudio Ranieri. Which means I don’t care for Nottingham Forest being re-established in the Premier League. And so on, and so on.”
60 min: Brilliant save from Areola! It’s Everton who look more likely at the moment. Mykolenko’s long ball was headed on beautifully by Calvert-Lewin in the centre circle. Doucoure surged through and, with defenders closing on either side, cut across a low, first-time drive from the edge of the D.
It was shaping away from Areola, who got down superbly to his left to fingertip it round the post. That’s terrific goalkeeping.
59 min Alvarez rifles over the bar from 25 yards. West Ham are starting to get a little desperate.
50 min “Boring and cagey might be the way that Everton need to operate to nick three points in games like this one,” says Matt Burtz. “If they can stay organised and maintain the clean sheet, there’s enough firepower on the bench with the likes of Beto and Danjuma to score a late winner. But I also imagine Dyche would readily accept a scoreless draw.”
Yep, agreed. When I said it was a poor game I wasn’t being critical of the approach. Pragmatism has worked for both these managers throughout their careers.
48 min: Chance for Bowen! Cresswell curls the free-kick to the far post, where Bowen gets the wrong side of the sleeping Doucoure but heads over from eight yards. Though he had to stoop to meet the ball, it was still a pretty good chance.
48 min Cresswell tries to play a one-two with Ward-Prowse and is fouled by Patterson. Free-kick to West Ham on the left wing…
“If today’s MBM gets too dull,” begins Fred Decker, who has an interesting take on the word ‘if’, “you might want to check out the highlights of last night’s final from the Canadian Premier League, our tier-2 pro league after MLS.
“Calgary’s Cavalry FC were tops in the regular season, but faced second-place Forge FC from Hamilton (a steel town, like Sheffield, hence the name) who had won four of the five CPL titles to date. Forge are Cavalry’s bogey team, and although Cavalry had the better chances it was 0-0 after 90 minutes. The match was settled by three highly entertaining goals scored in a ten-minute span, beginning at the 101st minute.
These podcasts are great, if slightly tragic, fun to record. I’ve no idea whether they are fun to listen to, and with an attacking trident of Giggs, Cantgona and Waddle, I don’t care.
Half time: West Ham 0-0 Everton
Or, to put it another way, Pragmatism 1-0 Idealism. Both sides have worked hard, and we should probably leave it at that. It’s been a poor game.
45+2 min McNeil’s flat cross is headed well wide by Onana. It was no sort of chance. But Sean Dyche will be pretty pleased because Everton have kept West Ham quiet and had marginally the better chances. It’s not exactly an xG orgy but I’d be surprised if Everton aren’t ahead.
45+1 min “I can’t believe that someone at Everton has had the audacity of comparing their current shower with the great Danish Dynamite team of the 80s,” says Justin Kavanagh. “What would an apt nickname be for these greyshirts? The Everton Evaporation? The Toffee Tranquilisation?”
Arf. Well, in their defence, it was somebody at Hummel rather than Everton – a lot of their shirts this season have the Denmark 86 design.
44 min Look, this isn’t a great game. We’ve had only two shots on target, both pretty tame. But at least it means we’re not following the cricket.
43 min “Every True Blue mourns the death of one of our own,” says Gary Naylor. “Success in theatre is more a matter of alchemy than it is in sport. I mean, Hamilton, Book of Mormon, Sweeney Todd? One common factor is casting for which there is no reliable playbook. As in football, it is critical, as demonstrated in Dear England, in which Joseph Fiennes is brilliant as Gareth Southgate, but the whole production would fail were it not for the guys playing Jordan Pickford, Bukayo Saka, Dele Alli and, especially, Harry Kane. Highly recommended and streaming soon!”
The sequel, Jude Conquers the World, sounds too.
